I feel bad for Captain Canada though. Through his generosity and care is a small boy, who threw himself into a world he believes he can make, but it doesn't belong to him. How can you protect a person who thinks they always know best? He is going to give me his bike when he leaves. It makes me feel like a man in a world where 'real men' need to prove their masculinity by plucking their eyebrows.
Yesterday a certain pattern repeated itself with my ex boyfriend and I initially wondered how far and to what extent would a normal person go to keep in contact with someone they were once with. I have over the last year felt extremely pressured to keep a friendship with my ex, through being bullied and harassed to being emotionally blackmailed by him. However I feel differently because I simply don't care (the stage where you don't even bother telling the people you told about the time before). However, I do wonder how I could be such an influence on someones life by not actually doing anything, and you know what they say, even supermodels get lonely. I however believe supermodels are really busy, and if you spend your time pining after someone or something, then you're not helping your situation and you find something worth while to do or a good cause to live for rather than attending to your own selfish emotional needs. Pull your head out your ass cos the light is actually switched ON.
I have encountered people and exchanges all week with a mixture of nice and nasty. I feel like including a couple of lists so here are two lists of things that have made me really angry and happy over the last fortnight. I'll start with the anger list, get the bad out first:
BAD
- reading terrible reviews on google about my estate agents
- general estate agent paranoia
- more snow
- girl stabbed on bus
- having to get bus from moseley with previous bullet point's paranoia
- being heavily armed with sharp kitchen cutlery enroute to pussy palace
- fundraiser bitch ruining my day and being a cunt. for the complaint see the end of the post.
- party cancellation due to "a bad feeling"
- having to reassure a number of girls over problems that seem so trivial. what are friends for though!
- running out of skins and having to roll a spliff with a page from the bible
- cunts of solihull being, well, cunts
- having to pay extra months rent because im lazy and never read my post
GOOD
- a cat
- moving went exactly as planned
- full hope of receiving full deposit
- red wine
- bonus due at end of month
- sense of organisation that just comes from nowhere
- general contentment
- stew and dumplings
- mothers day fun (i got her lillies)
- an abundance of cannabis
- realising that if there is something i dont want at pussy palace, there are 2 men willing to burn it for me
- Captain Canada finally getting a job
Pussy Palace is amazing. It's probably the best place ever because it is warm and safe. Everyone has been helpful with moving and helping me settle in. I've only stayed there once but it's so near Steve's that it's no effort at all to move between the two. The second Monday away was Ben's birthday and I took him out for dinner because a few days before I think he realised that to get my attention and for me to be nice you'd have to have some sort of problem that involves loneliness. When I told him I was on to him and that I wasn't amused he changed his tune, but I took him out nevertheless because I really like Cote and I am glad because I was served the most succulent chicken I've ever sunk my beak into. I got him pissed beforehand at Island on my favourite cocktail (Zombie), whilst letting him talk his usual pointless small talk between intervals of proclaiming that he doesn't get drunk easily despite the zombie which had clearly gone straight to his head. I reminded him that Chinese people only need to have one drink and they are gone for the whole night. We then proceeded to the restaurant where I unknowingly made him cry by ranting about my life (I'd had wine and was on social and political auto-witter) and then him telling me how good I am. How does that white picket fence look now? Cos I just drove through it. I hate it when he cries, it's a little bit pathetic. He cried when I told him about how I was bullied at school. Surely it should be the other way round?
Oh and I made friends with an entire glee club from Florida via Chatroulette. I was bored and decided to see if I could fool some American girls into believing I was straight and seducing them with my accent but ended up listening to a guy singing a bit like Whitney Houston. I hope to meet them one day and join their group. My grandparents are in Florida at the moment, maybe she should meet them for me.
Picture updates...
A quick sketch of mine
My new cat reading up before the big spell
No comments:
Post a Comment