London Moaning

So I've been to London to see my great 'friend' Matt, and lets just say that it's one thing I didn't want to do out of the way. I am finally home, from what can only be described as a typical weekend with this friend of mine. The trains were all screwed up so it took me 3 hours to get back, as I had to get a coach between Bicester and Leamington. I actually didn't mind, the day was nice and I've had a lot of time to think. So really I shouldn't be complaining about my friend as I didn't actually see him all weekend, and when I did he more or less ignored me, and I really just wanted to get away for the weekend to think things through. And I thought a lot of things over about stuff and have come to some serious decision making. It's not easy, but I need to take control. Anyway, my trip to London wasn't entirely wasted, as proved in the following things I also learnt:

• No matter how great you think you are, you are still a nobody in London.
• Tomb Raider is actually a really good film (was expecting it to be shit)
• Angelina Jolie really suits an English accent and has amazing tits.
• I might fancy Angelina Jolie.
• Consider going straight due to infatuation with Angelina Jolie and disappointing relationships with all men. 
• Then consider that women are probably REALLY hard work.
• I like Matt's house mate Claire more than Matt. She shares the exact same birthday as me.
• Soho is overrated. 
• The more I suffer, the more attractive I find myself.

Anyway I've come to the conclusion that Matt is a twat who obviously has some sort of ego problem because he likes making me feel like shit. What is the fucking point in inviting me down for a weekend of fun and catching up when you spend half the time either criticising me, acting like I am some sort of freak on day release, and the other half of the time spent totally ignoring me, to the point where you won't even WALK with me, because, and in your own words 'no offence, but you just don't walk fast enough'. You didn't even ask how I was when I arrived. So fuck you.